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12 lessons I’ve learnt from six years of blogging

06/08/2017 by Charlotte Leave a Comment

12 things you'll learn from bloggingI started blogging because I felt like a writer with nowhere to write, so in the absence of a garden big enough for a shed, I built a blog instead.

And six years on, I’m still here. It’s nice having a record of how I’ve grown up, developed my writing, and got my head around various thoughts, feelings and life events.

People sometimes ask me questions about what blogging involves, so I thought I’d share some lessons. If you have more questions after reading this, please do ask them. All (kind) forms of correspondence are always welcome.

1. People are not that nice

If people read what you’ve written it’s because they want to read it. If they don’t want to they won’t. It’s as simple as that. People might give you a supportive click or two at the beginning to help you on your way. But when you’re a few months or years down the line, no matter how close a friend/sister/pet they are, they simply won’t open your blog unless they’re interested. And that’s a good thing. Pity reads are no use to anyone.

2. Most of the time, you simply won’t know what people think

Unless you’re planning to go door to door, asking all your acquaintances if they did or did not click on the link to your latest post about the highs and lows of using a chemical toilet (a real post I remain deeply proud of), you won’t know. You might get a like or a comment from a keen and kind reader but there’s no obligation for people to give you feedback.

And you’re also very unlikely to get personalised notes from everyone who doesn’t fancy reading your stuff. Anybody who does send you such a note needs to reconsider how they use their time. Speaking of which…

3. A few people reeeeally aren’t that nice 

As women messing about on the internet go, I’ve been pretty lucky on the troll front. I’ve only ever had two very nasty comments left on this blog. And although I will remember them forever, I think they did me good. Because if you’re going to write on the regular and put it out there for people to read, you need to develop a thick skin. (If only, most of the time, to deal with the deafening silence that can follow once you’ve hit publish.)

You can’t spend your time being worried about what a troll might say. The post that encouraged OUTRAGE from my bridge-dweller was about why I recommend giving your partner a sufficient number of bedroom drawers to store their pants. He/she told me to ‘PLEASE shut my f***ing blog down’. Sorry, friend. No chance. Where else are people to go for such innovative life advice?

12 things I've learnt from six years of blogging4. Only time will teach you what you’ve really got to say

It’s taken me years to develop my writing style and tone. There was no other way to do it than to just get on and DO IT. I’m not claiming to have nailed it, I just know how I like to write now. And I continue to enjoy experimenting with it, pushing the odd boundary, and finding new ways to express myself. Your blog is your house and you have the floor so use it to get it wrong, get it right, and enjoy yourself along the way.

5. Thanks to blogging, I will never be bored

You know when you used to have to fill in the bit on your CV about your hobbies and scrabble around for something to say that wasn’t ‘Watching re-runs of Friends’ and ‘Debating which are the tastiest members of the Percy Pig family’? Well, now I have blogging. Hanging out in my house on my own is never a problem as I can just grab a notebook or my laptop and see what I’ve got to say. What a treat! Or, equally as fun, I can lie around thinking about writing, and then not actually ever get around to it. That’s when you know you’re becoming a true professional…

6. You have more time than you think

People have different views about how frequently you should blog. I think you should do it whenever you can and you want to. Some people run sites which have advertising and content commitments requiring them to post on a particular basis, but the rest of us can do as we please.

For us it’s just about finding time, and what I’ve learnt is that if you want to do it, you will find the hours you need. Sundays are my usual day for writing, but sometimes I do a little on another day, or I have a whole week off, or I’m inspired to write three posts at once. I think it’s best just not to put too much pressure on the whole thing. Your writing will be much better if you’re doing it because you want to.

12 things I've learnt from six years of blogging7.Your blog may not become your job, but it might help you get other ones

I get asked a lot about blogging and money making, and this is what I say: This blog is not my job, it’s my hobby, it’s where I come to be creative, and it’s also where I store my portfolio, which I use to seek paid writing work. Although the blog itself doesn’t generally make me money (I’ve only ever done one sponsored post with a brand that fitted in with my subject matter), it has helped me get other jobs.

In order to make money directly from a blog on a regular basis, you need a clear niche that advertisers/sponsors etc. can support. Only you can know your motivations for running a blog, but it strikes me that the most successful ones – whether in terms of reads or money made – came about because people wanted to speak about a particular subject they’re passionate about, and then the rest followed.

Don’t get me wrong, I’d be delighted to bring home more dollar thanks to this baby, but I don’t ever want to compromise what the site is for. It’s for honest posts and chats about what it is to be human. (So if you’re a brand that’ll let me chat about that in return for some ££ and a mention, give a girl a call!)

8. You don’t have to be a web designer, you just need patience

Building a blog can be as difficult or as simple as you make it. I started out on Google Blogger as it was free and easy to use, and then as I got a bit more serious about it and wanted my own url, I moved over to this self-hosted WordPress site. It’s not fancy and there’s lots more I’d like to do with it, but it will do just fine, and I can change it any time I want to (read: can find the strength).

You just have to decide what you want the site to do, and then to work away at bringing it about. I recommend having a cushion set aside specifically for screaming into whilst you build. Believe me, you’ll need it.

9. You’ll realise there are hundreds of people just like you

Blogging has opened up a whole new world of people and events I never knew I’d enjoy. It made me realise how much I love writing, learning about writing, and meeting people equally excited about all things pen and paper. I’m part of the Mumsnet Bloggers Network and have been to their annual Blogfest three times (my baby is due in November, when Blogfest is usually held, so unless this year’s event is happening in a maternity ward, I’m going to have to give it a miss). And I’ve been to other blogging workshops and talks about creativity that have taught me new things and inspired the sh*t out of me. And I can’t recommend that feeling enough.

12 lessons I've learnt from six years of blogging10. Other people will do much better at blogging and you won’t know why 

Why a blog is or is not popular can sometimes be obvious and can sometimes totally throw you. I find that if I think I’ve written something good, it’ll fall flat as a pancake. And if I struggle through a post and end up publishing just to justify the hours of blood, sweat and tears I’ve put into it – even if I think the entire thing is pointless and so am I – people will like it. So what do I know.

I think what’s most important is just to keep writing what you want to write. Authentic posts are always the best. Any likes and shares and whatnot they score the writer have to just be a bonus.

11. Writing something people relate to is a high like no other

Having said that, there’s no denying the utter joy of penning something other people can relate to. Something that makes them say ‘This is what I’ve been thinking but couldn’t articulate’ or ‘IT’S LIKE YOU’RE IN MY BRAIN’ or ‘Are you actually monitoring my thoughts because this is so in line with them that I’m genuinely FRIGHTENED’. I cannot pretend that such comments do not fill me up because they do.

12. Writing feeds your soul

I’ve written regularly for so long now that if I take too much of a break, I start to feel uncomfortable. It’s become a crucial part of how I figure out what I think about different subjects. Lots of people say it but it’s true – I often don’t really know what I think about something until I start writing about it. It’s the cheapest therapy I’ll ever undertake and I’d hate to be without it.

This game isn’t for everyone. Most people would rather tear their hair out than spend their free hours talking to themselves through a computer screen. But we’re not most people, are we? This blog may not have made me a millionaire or anything close to one, but it has taught me more about myself and the world than I ever could have expected. And for that I will always be grateful.

So here’s to another year of Nothing good rhymes with Charlotte. Knowing how livid this site’s continued existence would make our darling troll makes each anniversary all the more worth celebrating.

Posted in: ON WRITING Tagged: blog, Blogcademy, Blogfest, blogging, feedback, lessons, Mumsnet, six years blogging, tips, trolls, what blogging has taught me, writing, writing tips

The top 7 things I learnt at Blogcademy

21/07/2014 by Charlotte 6 Comments

Charlotte-Buxton-Blogcademy-gold-sparkly-rabbit-earsI spent this weekend in Shoreditch. There’s a sentence I haven’t written before.

Yes, I left the house and the sofa and the lure of the Coronation Street omnibus (which I am very much looking forward to devouring later) to head out to blog school – AKA The Blogcademy – to learn how to make this little website of mine better.

I started this blog because I wanted somewhere to write and be creative (and to make fun of my other half for being DREADFUL at basic domestic duties. It’s a wonder it hasn’t torn us apart, to be honest). And now that it’s been going for a while and I’ve figured out how I like to write and that there are even some people out there who want to read it, it’s time to turn it into a more coherent, focused blog, rather than just a place where I come to have thoughts. I’ve basically been treating it like the bath until now.

So I went along to hang out with 40 or so fellow bloggers and to learn from the very impressive Shauna Haider, Kat Williams (of Rock n Roll Bride fame), and Gala Darling – team Blogcademy (pictured below with me. Like my ears?)

Charlotte-Buxton-Blogcademy-Kat-Williams-Gala-Darling-Shauna-Haider

And I learnt a lot; I mean A LOT. My hand hurts from writing so many notes, my brain hurts from spending two whole days paying attention, and my stomach hurts in advance of all the chocolate I’m inevitably going to eat whilst trying to get my blog up to scratch.

I could write a post 100 points long to share all the tips I picked up, but that would go against everything we learnt about the importance of being interesting and succinct. So instead I’ll just share the top seven things I’ve taken away from the weekend – and then I’ll have no excuse not to get cracking with putting it all in place…

1. Define your blog’s purpose.
This is something I have been dodging for a long time. If you’ve ever had a conversation with me about what this blog is about you’ll know that I am unable to express it quickly, if at all – or certainly not without flapping my arms a lot and saying “Well, it’s sort of meant to be funny – HAHAHA” in the hope that you’ll change the subject. This needs to change. When I actually sat down and thought about it (and strapped my arms to my sides to prevent the inevitable flapping) I decided that overall this blog is probably about relationships, what they realistically entail and laughing at and celebrating the mundane. As much as it might seem like it’s just about me taking every opportunity possible to mention how much I like Pringles, there is more to it than that, I promise.

2. Always write with a very specific reader in mind.
Of course! It’s so obvious! But how many of us actually do it? Not me. One of the most useful things Kat said is that your ideal reader might be you five years ago – i.e. somebody who can learn from you. In my case, five years ago, my husband and I had just moved in together and were learning how to cope with our differing habits (mine: complaining when the bin hasn’t been taken out; his: relentlessly failing to take the bin out). That girl might have liked what I write. Having said that, I know that a lot of the people who read this are either at similar stages in life to me or a little further on so perhaps it’s one of them I should keep in mind. My mum is also a big fan but there’s a chance she’s a little biased (not towards me, just towards the posts that mention her.) Either way, I think some market research is in order.

Charlotte-Buxton-Charlotte-Art-Blogcademy

Drawings by the amazing @charlotteart (P.S I WANT those knickers)

3. People are interested in what you can do for them. Be helpful.
I’m sure you will agree I am currently nailing this one, sharing all my new found wisdom like this. But again – of course! This makes total sense, particularly when I think about my own posts which have been most popular. Relationships: Six ways to help keep things interesting remains my most read, shared and liked post of all time. And I think it might be because it was in some way useful; if only to remind people that there is somebody else out there who believes that Boots Advantage Card points are a reasonable topic of conversation. This has made me think a lot too about what we really mean by ‘helpful’. You don’t necessarily have to teach somebody something really profound (though I think you’ll agree my suggestion about serving snacks in nice bowls was pretty out there), you can just write something which people can relate to; that enables them to see a side of themselves represented. In short, I will admit that people leaving lights switched on in rooms they’re not in is annoying, so you don’t have to.

4. Come up with some regular features.
You have probably noticed that I blog once a week. This has kept me going until now but I need to do more. And the way to do this, I now know, is to come up with some regular features I can share on other days of the week. I’m not quite sure what they’re going to be yet (Marshmallow Monday sounds cool but what would it really be about?) but I think they’re an ace idea so I am going to give it a go. Perhaps an interview with other couples to see what their lives together are really like, or an attempt at a funny take on those often ridiculous relationship Q&As you get in newspapers? I think I could have quite a lot of fun with that.


5. Your blog is your brand. Like it or not.
Whether I am really planning for this blog to make me money I don’t know but this weekend taught me that either way, I need to treat it like a business with its own brand that readers immediately recognise. Sure, you might know what my face looks like thanks to the giant picture of it at the top of the page but that’s not really branding, more narcissism. So I need to do some work. And I find this part the most intimidating because I am not a designer and certainly not good at building websites (this current format took me a full day and LOTS of shouting to get in place). I need to change platform and I am also considering changing the name so that people can tell sooner what this whole thing is about. I love Nothing Good Rhymes with Charlotte but what does it tell you? (other than that I’m clearly hilarious). This is probably the hardest part so I will not be rushing into anything. And anyway, won’t I miss having EVERY person who reads this remind me that Scarlett rhymes with Charlotte? Actually, now I come to mention it, no I won’t.

Charlotte-Buxton-Blogcademy-balloon


6. Be organised.
It is so nice but so daunting to come away from an event with a to-do list the length of your house. But this is of course what you want from a course you’ve paid money for. So now I need to get on with it. I’m going to write down my goals, make a plan and get my sh*t together. I’m even going to tidy my desk to help make this happen. If you’ve seen my desk (or Post We Haven’t Bothered To Open In Two Years Mountain, as I like to call it) you’ll know this was no small task.


7. Ask people what they think.
Unsurprisingly the people who know that they like to read are your readers – DUH. And it’s time I started asking some questions – about the blog’s name, about the things I write that they like, that they don’t like, about whether it’s actually just me that finds jokes about bins funny… A little market research will do me and this the world of good. In fact, why not start now – if you have thoughts on what is good/great/bad/missing from/outrageously offensive about this blog, please tell me. Leave a comment, send me a tweet, leave a Facebook comment, come round to my house, sit me down and tell me how it is… whichever way you like, I would love to hear from you and to use what you think to help make this better. Just remember that if you do decide to come over, you need to bring some crisps. I’ve got some very fancy bowls I’d love you to see.

Thank you to team Blogcademy for a great weekend and to all the lovely blogger chums I met across the two days. I most definitely feel that I got SCHOOLED. Now the hard work really begins…

Posted in: Uncategorized Tagged: Blogcademy, blogging, conversation, decisions, friends, learning, networking, writing

HELLO, I’M CHARLOTTE

About me

Nothing good rhymes with Charlotte is a blog filled with honest words about what it means to be human. I write about relationships and confidence, and, more recently, since I had my baby girl, PARENTING. I just want us all to feel that bit less alone. I will try to make you laugh too, let me know if I manage it. Get in touch: nothinggoodrhymeswithcharlotte@gmail.com

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