I feel like I have been through all of the emotions associated with wedding planning whilst reading just one wedding magazine. Fear, excitement, frustration, creativity (not technically an emotion but definitely a feeling), helplessness and calm; all brought on by flicking through just 263 pages of bridal ideas and advice. And I’m only just two thirds of the way through.
How do they expect you to feel? Adverts showing beautiful dresses at unspeakable prices, articles about flat-deposit sized wedding budgets, and a throughout assumption that you have access to ‘vintage’ on a day to day basis. I just don’t think I live a bride-to-be’s life, or perhaps it is all just a fantasy.
I’ve clearly not fully thought this through. I’m not talking about the marriage itself, I’ve definitely thought that through, but the size and detail of running a wedding.
‘How about having a vintage birdcage for guests to put your wedding cards in?’ Well, that is a really lovely idea, but oddly the suggestion of it fills me with simultaneous joy and panic. Joy at how pretty the example looks and how nice it would be to have one, but panic at the realisation that I hadn’t even considered that this kind of thing would need to be considered. I want to get it right, I need to get it right, it’s just going to take a few nudges in the right direction to help me along the way. Or a checklist, a very long checklist.
The prospect of committing to making parts of the wedding myself is currently spinning around my brain. Table decorations, wedding invitations, pin boards for the reception room – in theory it sounds like a lot of fun, but in practice I wonder if I have the skill and patience it takes. But this is why we gave ourselves at least 18 months to get everything in place I suppose. Time to spend weekends writing place cards and weaving paper together into heart shapes. Time to drift from shop to shop, picking out little vases and flower pots. I don’t think I’ve never heard a wedding planning story which sounded like it involved much drifting, but we can try.
And the excitement comes from the brightness of it all, the colours and the pretties and the knowledge that it’s our turn to give this big show a go. What will we choose? How will we make it all look like us? There’s no two people better placed to figure that all out I suppose.
So as the ideas come, I shall write them down and we’ll take it from there, one step at a time. Wedding magazines are there to add to the fun, provide a little advice, and definitely to test the boundaries of what we can afford. And it’s certainly helpful to have a group of people 50 steps ahead of me on the planning front – if there’s something missing from the checklist, and there will be, they’ll be the first to let me know.
As long as I keep at least one foot on the ground and an eye on the horizon, I should be able to keep my perspective long enough to revel in the glossy pages and shiny pictures without suddenly finding myself the bride at a wedding I’ll be paying off for decades. And I’d better lap it all up whilst I can anyway. If I’m spotted buying one of these in a couple of years’ time when that extra ring is firmly on my finger, I’m definitely going to get some questions.